3 Tips for Rediscovering Your Confidence as You Age

For many people, confidence is hard to discover at any point in life. But it can be particularly elusive as you age. However, just because your mind and body are slowing down doesn’t mean you have to let it affect your self-worth. 

The Confidence Curve

An individual’s confidence and self-esteem often follow a bell curve in relation to age. It starts off low, rises during the late teen years, hits a peak during middle age, then declines after a person reaches the age of 60. Psychologists have assumed this to be true for many years, and a study in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology proves it to be true.

The researchers from that study believe the main reason for this bell curve-like pattern has to do with the relationship between age, power, and health. When you’re young, you don’t have much power. You’re also uncertain of who you are in the world. Your body is changing and there’s not a lot that you feel like you control. But as you enter your 20s, 30s, and 40s, you typically earn more power and status, which translates into greater confidence. (This is also when most people hit their peak physical status.) Then, around the age of 60 (retirement range), you lose some of this power, and your health gradually declines. As a result, confidence slowly wanes.

Waning confidence in old age can also be due to ageism – the idea that you’re “too old” to perform certain activities. A separate study in the Journal of Geriatrics finds that age stereotypes can actually diminish your ability to perform tasks over time, even if you still possess the proper skills to perform them. In other words, the perception alone is enough to kill your confidence and keep you from doing things you’re fully capable of doing. 

3 Ways to Reclaim Your Confidence

The good news is that confidence is something you have influence over. And while most people see their confidence levels diminish as they age, it’s not a forgone conclusion. You can continue to keep your confidence high – or reclaim the confidence you’ve recently lost – by doing the following:

• Learn a New Skill

Remember when you were in your teens and 20s and you would constantly try new things? Whether it was a sport, musical instrument, or hobby, you would pick things up and try them. Some of them weren’t a good fit, but you were pretty good at others. Why not try to learn a new skill again?

“Being a beginner again is tough, but it shows you can still accomplish new things and find enjoyment in them,” mental health counselor Fred Silverstone says. “This also reminds you that it’s okay to make mistakes, so you can improve and grow, which helps build self-confidence.”

Contrary to popular belief, you can teach an old dog new tricks. And when that “old dog” learns new tricks, confidence goes through the roof.

• Address Physical Signs of Aging

There’s nothing wrong with caring about your image. It’s not vain or conceited – it’s practical. When you look good, you also tend to feel good. Take pride in your outward appearance and take proactive steps to preserve your health and beauty.

Hair loss is a very common issue for millions of men and women. If this is something you’re dealing with, you should proactively address it. Because, whether you realize it or not, your thinning hair is directly influencing your slipping confidence. Laser cap therapy is one of the easiest solutions and can be performed at home.

If you’re struggling with wrinkles and poor skin quality, there are things you can do in this regard as well. Wrinkle treatment options include moisturizers, acid peels, dermabrasion, laser resurfacing, and certain injections. Ask your doctor for recommendations.

• Invest in Relationships

It can be difficult to maintain relationships as you age. This is especially challenging if you’re no longer working and/or don’t have regular interactions with the same groups of people that you did during your younger years. But it’s absolutely imperative that you stay connected. 

Make it a point to meet new people each week. Join a local group and be proactive about socializing. Choose something that you enjoy – possibly even a class you can teach or a charitable organization you can serve in. The more you engage with positive people, the greater your confidence levels will soar.

Live Your Best Years Now

It’s time to stop viewing aging as a slow decline and start looking at it as a brand new chapter filled with unique opportunities that have been kept from you for decades. Yes, things are different…but that can be a good thing. By staking claim to your confidence, you can continue to live your best years now.